We sat, ordered drinks and a small plate of fries.
I could see I was fucked by the fire in his eyes.
His confident manor gave nothing away.
Was I bound to see heaven a bit later today?
He flashed a wry smile as I started to talk.
He focused on me with the eyes of a hawk.
He listened intently to all that I said.
He knew I was his as so soon i’de be dead.
I told him my fears of the void I could sense.
No point in a lie as he’d feel my pretence.
Just for once in my life I would hold my head high.
Just a cunt that it’s only an hour till I die.
The waiter appeared with a tray and our drinks.
‘Enjoy your last meal’ then he casually winks.
Did this guy have a notion of what’s going on?
Did he know I was dying? I had hoped I was wrong.
With our fries and our drinks we said ‘Bon appetit’
But as always I sensed a Great Wall of deceit.
This chap’s only motive to get me sat here
Was to fill me with guilt and then feed off my fear.
The deal that I struck with this man long ago,
Was to save my sick sister. My life i’de forgo.
She lives one more day then she took her own life.
She lamented my choice and then picked up the knife.
This wasn’t the outcome I wanted to see.
This wasn’t the way that it was meant to be.
But the deal that was made was between me and him.
And it wasn’t his fault that she died on a whim.
So never take granted the things that you wish,
Or you’ll be like me in a pickle like this.
If you want something bad enough do it yourself.
Don’t fuck with the devil if you’ve got mental health.