I want to ride your bicycle….

I wanted to get on me bike today. (Me pushbike not me motorbike,he’s in the shop getting his rubbers sorted! no, not condoms!) But I had organised me cooker getting cleaned! (My life has taken a strange twist) and as I get the cleaning free from Currys, then why not? So when I wanted a ride, I had only one choice!

Now since me tredder hasn’t seen the light of day since I bought it, I wasn’t aware of any foibles it may have inherited from its parantage. As I climbed the bank near ASDA I realised that the gear shift is a bit shite. So as my knees and shins twatted the pedals and frame and stuff, I made a mental note to have a right pop at Halfords for being wieners and setting me bike up like total minions! 


As I hadn’t taking it out before, I forgot what kit I needed to have a bike ride! Warm kit/ sry kit/ tyre pump, you know, the usual stuff you would need for a trip out. Riding like a one legged giraffe on acid my rear tire decided all by itself that I was a fat bastard and proceeded to deflate itself just to spite me! Now I know the tyres are filled with green slime and didn’t have a puncture, so I had to drop into a shop and buy a Friggin pump. Having only a little backpack, I only needed a little pump (which I have in my flat) but seeing as I wasn’t going to go back there just yet, I bought one.

A fucking big one! In fact the ONLY one the shop had. (Didn’t cost much but it worked)! Although as I put it in me pack and pedalled like a twat, the Friggin handle beat me across the head at every step! Why I didn’t just go to the garage and use the pump there I have no idea. You may see a clean oven above, that’s because the cleaners took their time (two hours) to get it sorted before me bike ride. All good in the hood now. Not the most exciting day, but at least I started to get into the exercise phase of life 😕 

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