It makes me want to sit right down and cry cry cry.

My feelings tonight! but who sang about them?

Lets start tonight with how my day actually finished, well it hasn’t technically finished yet as I’m still up writing this! Anyway, I took Gareth and Nikkie back to the hotel after a chilled time at ‘Bonamare’ (more about that later) As i switched off Bob and undid my seatbelt, i did my usual thing of getting out the car to go around and keep the door for Nikkie. Only this time i decided to trap my fingers in the closing lump of metal.Not wanting to make myself look too much of a wuss, i pulled them out and gave a little cry and lifted my foot to try and pretend a fake kick to Bobs flanks, only it wasn’t pretend and i gave a hefty welly to her sills (With flip flops on) now my cry from the finger jamming disappeared in a wail of agony as i made contact with metal. I thought i broke my friggin big toe!

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Crying in pain (no tears but i definitely felt  sympathy for my big toe) i hobbled to the path a sat down holding my distraught foot. Now as soldiers go, you NEVER expect sympathy from the individual. All i heard from inside Bob were two giggling, cackling snorting gits laughing at my misfortune. I couldn’t blame them as i would have done the same, in fact i did earlier on in the day, so yes, Karma IS a bitch! As i surveyed the damage to my foot, i felt a little nauseous when i took hold of the toenail and peeled it back like a bleedin banana. This only served to bring even more merriment to the two Tw*ts standing laughing at me. (its all fun and games until someone loses an eye, or toe, or leg) Once they were happily ensconced in the hotel, i walked back to bob and apologised for being an idiot. 

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The swim in the morning was all about navigation. Myself, with Gareth and Nikkie (who are now also on the advanced open water course) started as we meant to go on, (Being three military minded people on a course) Patrick (The other student from my open water course) rocked up from his deep dive (sporting a poorly ear) a fact that we had much joy taking the Mickey out of him for. In fact (apart from the instructor (Gemma)) we had a 14 year old guy called Cameron join us (He was the most adult person there) I think it took a while for our humour to filter into their worlds, but eventually even Cameron laughed at lewd jokes. 

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Swimming out, turn right, swim the same length. Turn right, swim the same length. Turn right, swim the same length (you can see this wasn’t going to be hard) The Navigation was to trust your compass (we are soldiers, it’s the ONLY thing we trust) unfortunately as i got to open water, my regulator decide to play silly buggers and started to let my air out for NO apparent reason (this task was going to be a bit difficult to attempt with no air) but Gemma suggested i carry on as i could go first then surface as not to drown too much!! (she is trying to do me in I’m sure) Mine was sorted, set the compass and do one, turn right, turn right, turn right. Not hard!!!

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We spent some time after that in a cafe at the beach near the end of town studying the stuff we were meant to study yesterday (not too clever when the other two just got their books today) a Mojito certainly stimulates the learning cortex of your brain!!!! all was going fantastic, right until Nikkie decided she needed the toilet. Off she went all happy and chipper. She came back white as a ghost talking wildly about her irrational fear of spiders. (I don’t think its irrational) as the toilet she had visited was infested with extras from the film ‘Arachnophobia’ as she regaled her story to me a leaf fell from a tree straight onto her chest. I wet myself laughing at her reaction, she wet herself AS the reaction, it got funnier as her eyes welled up, she had genuinely frightened herself and i thought it was hilarious (see karma)

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But tonight we drove to ‘Bonmare’ for something to eat and to just chill for a night away from the lights and noise of the town, Gareth showed me hints and tips on using my Canon, and Nikkie debated with her mother about the benefits (or not) of owning a bouncy castle. I got to speak to ‘Pickle’ she is fine and was making a cooker for her lego house (can’t be too bad i suppose) 

For my friends (wherever you are, stay safe) X

Published by dec247h

Ex soldier, father, party girl and generally nice guy taking time out to do as he pleases! one day i will make it back to the UK, but i aint in a hurry!

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