A mile from the sun

Today was hot, damn hot, it was the sort of heat that if you had a window, you would open it (to coin a phrase from a long ago movie) The factor six went on again and i could smell the tan crackling on my back and shoulders…. I still haven’t burned so its all good so far.

Tonight sees a change of venue from my usual haunt, the ……….Bar/Cafe type thing was on the cards until i wandered in and waited, and waited, and waited for the non English speaking rotund barmaid to ignore me for another minute or so. It seemed she had more important things to do outside like sitting on her fat arse talking crap with her Bezza!, i say non English speaking but i know she is just ignorant, she has served me before but swears she doesn’t understand, right up to the point where you say that you ate not going to pay, and suddenly her GCSE kicks into place. Well anyway, i couldn’t be bothered with her shenanigans after the disappointing dinner in the hotel. so i left, walked up the hill to a beautiful place called the Kavacafe, where i seemed to have gatecrashed th local youth meeting, but its free and the coffee is good, we will see th eMojitos later!!

Dinner at the hotel was going well, i had the usual salad and soup starter, i don’t know what the main was going to be as three Goose steppers marched in and invaded the hotplate, they had surrounded the potatoes i think and had eyes on the next table full of veg. It wouldn’t have been an issue except i have been living the Mess life for the last few years and when I’m told there is a dress code for evening meal, i adhere to it. These Nazi’s obviously did they’re normal thing and ignored all protocol as they were still in they’re shorts and t shirts! I seethed, i really did, not one person in that hotel had flounced these rules before (and they were British, Russian and various others from the uncivilised world) But ‘Vorsproke, Durke and Technique ‘ really took the biscuit, as i calmly wiped my soup face and folded my napkin, all thoughts i had was to approach the sausage eating murderers and give them a piece of good old British stiff upper lip, but as Discretion IS the better part of Valour i was very Valiant. so  body swerved them and headed for the Matre de (or whatever she was) and promptly asked what the dress code was for dinner because NO ONE was challenging the Reich. I was thus informed that since it was hot, the rules had been relaxed!!!!!!! Bloody Germans! got they’re own way again!!

So, to my day.i know that i had a wry smile and laugh at the ‘Holes in the ground’ the other day, and i know that was wrong, well not wrong, but wrong of me to voice that particular opinion on a friendly medium like this. So i went over to the old church in the middle of town and looked at the mosaics, they were unfortunately fenced off for the boardwalk for tourists to be updated and replaced, i wish they were more accessible, because the actual location moved me. The church was beautifully kept, and the little old girl that cleaned the inside had the happiest face and the loveliest song as she toiled. it made me realise that not everything in life is about the money. My mate said the other night that all you need is enough to live on, and i now know that he was right. These people rant rich monetarily, they are rich because they don’t care that they haven’t got the latest LED TV or Blue Ray Surround sound 3D system. I admire that. (Bollocks, the Kavacafe, doesn’t do cocktails, so no Mojitos, just Jack and coke) oh well. Cyprus could defiantly leave its mark on my life! 

Im now starting to look at the colour i have been missing for a week or so, noticing the people, (one total stranger outside a cafe just said “hello” as i walked by, asked for nothing and expected only a ‘hello; back) noticing the buildings, the flowers trees (IM NOT TURNING GAY) but they’re seems to be more to this writing malarkey than a quick jest hers and a sly poke there. I obviously will still d those things, but ill inject a little humanity into the proceedings too. One thing i have noticed though, is the complete lack of ANY and ALL driving skills across here, if i was going t buy a car (and I’m looking) then it will be a banger worth about €400. i wouldn’t trust these idiots on the road one iota. Today a motorcyclist (well scoter) decided to put his friend on the back seat and another between himself and the handle bars carrying shopping, the wrong way down a duel carriage way. i kid you not, and its not an isolated incident either! 

Ill do a comprehensive Blog about the food over here in the next day or two, as i will be putting my money down tomorrow on my apartment, and eating out for a little while until i stock my fridge full of healthy stuff, like fish and other stuff (i had a mind melt there) anyway, i hope you keep reading as ill keep writing in the hope that enough people get some sort of light relief from a real idiots travels!

For Skye XP1030478

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